Intelligence Is A Curse » humor

Boys (not Men) suck.

Tellie — Sat, 09 May 2009 15:04:01 +0000

So I lived overseas pretty much my whole life but I did attend middle school in this state for a year. So when I saw my old middle school classmate (let’s call him John Doe) attending the same university as I, I was excited. SOMEONE I KNEW!! I was hesitant at first to talk to him (We have a history) but after a few months weeks, i finally mustered up the courage to talk to him. This day just so happened to be yesterday.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT THIS FOOL DID!!???

He pretended like he didn’t know me. Apparently his name ain’t John Doe it’s John “Roe”. Dude. If you’re going to change your name, do so by more than one letter. And he claims he’s never lived in this state a day in his life. WTF? I saw the light bulb go off in his head when he realized who I was. I’m not stupid. AND YOUR REAL NAME IS IN THE SCHOOL SYSTEM YOU RETARD.

In conclusion, boys suck.

© Tellie for Intelligence Is A Curse, 2009. | Permalink | 9 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: boys, humor, men, not smart, suck

Americans are stupid and I’m suppose to be proud

Tellie — Wed, 06 May 2009 15:30:31 +0000

These are REAL conversations I’ve had with people:

Lady: So where are you from?
Me: I just moved from Korea
Lady: Oh so are your parents Jewish missionaries…?
Me: Uhh…no…?
Lady: Oh because I knew this Jewish girl whose parents were missionaries, not that you look Jewish or anything…

WTF?! No duh i don’t look jewish.

Dude: So where are you from?
Me: I just moved here from Korea
Dude: Oh is one of your parents Korean?

Do I look Korean?

Person: So where are you from?
Me: I just moved here from Korea
Person: North or South?

I don’t know how many times I’ve been asked this. Seriously if I even THOUGHT about living in North Korea I’d be an idiot seeing as I’d most likely be killed. This is the dumbest question ever…wait there’s a worse one…

*In elevator in a hotel in Hawaii about 5 or 6 years ago*

Full Grown 35 year oldish Blonde lady: So where is everyone coming from?
Random Guy: Utah
Random Gal: California
Me: Japan
Blonde lady: Wow!!!!! You’re english IS VERY GOOD

Like seriously are people really this dumb? I have not one Asian feature about me! GAHH.

© Tellie for Intelligence Is A Curse, 2009. | Permalink | 29 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: America, Expat life, humor, stupidity

How to pull an all-nighter

Tellie — Sat, 02 May 2009 19:06:00 +0000

All my procrastinating is catching up with me I’m really busy. I know I don’t do things ahead of time work hard to keep my schedule balanced. In fact if tonight is the night, it will be a first in all my college life. I’ve done it in high school too many times once or twice. I am sippin on some chai tea in hopes of a caffeine boost. Will go to starbucks first thing tomorrow too. I don’t drink coffee but it’s an emergency.

How to pull an all-nighter:

1. Get some blasting music going to keep you alert try to limit it to Techno and Heavy metal even if you don’t like that stuff.
2. Drink a cup of joe before you get started and by a I mean one anymore and you will probably crash
3. Around 3am-4am take a shower to wake yourself even more, or wait until you start feeling tired
4. If you must take a nap, limit it to no more than 20 minutes
5. Don’t study in your bed or on a couch do so in a hard uncomfortable computer chair where you must sit up
6. Eat something but don’t overdo it. Eating to much will make you tired.
7. Take a break every 50 minutes. The break should be 10 minutes long.
8. Walk around if you need too.
9. Stay focused. Don’t get side tracked!!!
10. Set mini-deadlines and goals: i.e. by 1:00am have chapter 11 covered.

© Tellie for Intelligence Is A Curse, 2009. | Permalink | 6 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: college, college life, how to, humor

I am HUGE in Japan

Tellie — Fri, 01 May 2009 02:32:35 +0000

The entire country of japan is the size of a family Sedan. I’m not kidding. Living in Japan and other Asian countries for a total of 6 years has really taken its toll!! I seriously thought I was fat. I wore the second to last size jeans they offered in most Asian markets and I was embarrassed. Sometimes old Asian men and women would come up to me and tell me “OOOHh!! You’re soooo biggg!!!!” I even heard a “chubby , chubby girl” once.

Guess what size pants I wear?

2/4.

I know I need to embrace my body, love it for what it is, but this was during a critical point in my life; the beginning of my puberty years. I felt horrible on the inside, i felt ugly. I was fat.

When I moved back to the US a few years ago I was far from “fat” I was actually on the small side and I’ve even been called “skinny” up North. And I look like I have “been starved and anorexic” down South. I just hope that now I have matured enough to know that I am not fat, my body is perfectly normal, and I am beautiful no matter what they say because words can’t bring me down.

© Tellie for Intelligence Is A Curse, 2009. | Permalink | 10 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: asia, Expat life, humor, japan